Saturday, February 14, 2009

How to Tell a Woman By Her Purse


Everything you want to know about a woman, you can find out by investigating her purse. However, from what I understand about most men, they still don't know what to make of the things they find in there. I will take the next few moments to decipher this ancient code.

We'll go by purse style first:

Designer purse: The girl that carries this kind of purse is one to watch out for. She spent over 300 dollars on a bag that will get worn out and thrown away in less than a year. Run away from these purses. They are usually attached to extremely high maintenance girls who care much more about their appearance than anything/anyone.

Imitation designer purse: The gals that carry these are interesting. They want to look like they're incredibly stylish, but in actuality are way too cheap to shell out the serious cash.

Payless Purses: This refers to the most common type of purse: one found at a department store of some type. These rank low on the imagination scale, but high on the practical one. Women who use these types are easily pleased, are not overly concerned about appearances, and are usually quite fiscally sound.

Purses that could hide a small terrorist: I like to call these the "Mom" purses. Luckily, these have recently come back into fashion, but a few years ago, it was very easy to spot the moms just by their bags. Once a child gets too old for Mom to cart around a diaper bag, she transfers most, if not all, of the contents to her purse. The result is the picture above. It becomes a combination of Mary Poppin's bag and the Black Hole.

No purse at all: These women are most likely homeless. You should beware because if you date a woman that does not own a purse, she will most likely depend on your pockets for carrying her essentials, or her recyclable cans.

5 comments:

Rosa Bianca said...

Hey, just wanted to say that stumbled across your blog and loved it so I'll be passing through once in awhile. (-: I'm in school to become an elementary teacher and also love the color purple, so I figured that was enough in common to enjoy your posts and so far it seems to hold true.

PS I'm definitely a Payless purse kind of gal!

Julianne said...

What does it mean if you own a purse, but pretty much never carry it? Wannabe homeless? That's me.

Cameron and Katie said...

I just cleaned out my purse yesterday because it was getting so heavy. Some of the things I dumped out that did not get put back in were a play phone, a bouncy ball, and three snack size bags of trail mix. Definitely a mom purse. It is like a Mary Poppins bag and when I took out the play phone, I did make sure there were other sources of entertainment for small hands in there (like stickers). I feel like it helps me keep the boy scout motto to never be unprepared. I did keep one bag of trail mix in there. Nothing worse than a hungry two-year-old, except a hungry mommy.

Angelee said...

I'm a total mom purse. I think it could still be considered a diaper bag, but I feel like that is socially unacceptable to carry when he is 2. So, I call it a purse. Maybe I'll take a picture of it cause it's hard to believe otherwise.

Parley and Katie Call said...

I am borderline mom-purse without the mom...You just never know when you'll need that cuticle trimmer, those 20 alcohol wipes, or jumbo pack of kleenex! And, I don't think I could have a super expensive purse b/c I love to change them so often. Would that be a "gypsy" purse?