An Exciting Christmas Gift!

Every year, I know my parents struggle to know what to buy for me. Which boggles me a little, because I always know what to buy for myself.

However, knowing that there is always a bit of confusion, and knowing that they don't appreciate wish lists and don't want me to have any idea of what I'm getting for Christmas, I made sure this year to drop a "not so subtle" hint.

I called Dad up one day and in the course of conversation, informed him that I was really excited because I had found a camera that I wanted at Costco and that I could easily save up the money to buy it. I told him the make, cost and location of said camera all in the guise that I would take several months to save up enough money to buy it (and no, it wasn't really that expensive of a camera, I exaggerated to him how long it would take me to get it, in hopes he would get it for me for Christmas).

Christmas morning comes and after a cursory glance under the tree, I decide that there is no camera underneath it.

Imagine my surprise when I open up a package and find not only the camera that I requested, but one vastly superior. I wanted one with a 10x zoom. I got one with a 24x. I wanted one that was 10 megapixels, and got one that was 12. I wanted one that was a Lexmark, and I got one that is a Nikon. I love my parents.

I've been so excited about using my camera and experimenting with all the different settings. I'm quite a nerd about it actually. I mean, my camera actually has a setting for taking pictures of fireworks, specifically.

Moral of the story? All of my friends with camera experience/knowledge are hereby requested to impart any/all knowledge of digital photography (i.e. shutter speeds, aperture, exposure, etc) as I am now ready to make my own knowledge match my excitement.

The Difference Between Men and Woman (a Q & A Session)

So recently, in my singles' ward (for those of you of a different religion, I go to church with a bunch of other single people in the hopes I can find me somebody to love. . . insert Queen song) we had a presentation given by our stake presidency on how to communicate better with people of the opposite gender. In order to give this presentation, we were supposed to fill out a survey answering the following questions:

1. What is the best thing about the opposite gender?

2. What is one thing you would change about the opposite gender?

3. What is one question you have about the opposite gender?

4. What is one thing you wish the opposite gender understood about your gender?

5. What relationship question do you have?

Unfortunately, I was sick on the day we got these surveys, but I was able to attend the lesson a week later. The lesson itself was great. It really focused on communicating as opposed to the oft used "Men, date the women more. Women, flirt more with the men" speech that I'm so used to. And it didn't solely focus on dating relationships, but on all relationships (work, school, etc)

At the end of the lesson, our teacher gave us a compilation of the answers from men who had turned in the survey (minus their names, of course). The men were given the women's answers. I feel it is my duty to answer some questions posed and respond to some of the allegations put at the feet of women everywhere. And since I speak for all women, this should be good:

(these are actual questions asked by real-life men and the answers I've given are surprisingly sincere. So, if you're expecting a lot of sarcastic remarks, you'll be a bit disappointed.)

Q. What's the best signal to look for that you're genuinely interested?

A. Smiling. When I'm around someone I'm interested in, I can't stop smiling. If the girl you want is frowning a lot, I'd say take it as a sign brother!

Q. How do you talk to them (ask them out)?

A. Also, no rocket-science to this one either. Talk to us like human beings. Don't brag or go on and on about yourself all the time. I've been on dates where I felt like I had to hit the guy in order to get a word in. Don't put yourself down in front of us, unless we're already pals and I know better than to take you seriously.

Q. What do they say about us while going to the bathroom in "packs?"

A. Most of the time, nothing at all. Sometimes it's just a chance to check in the mirror and make sure we haven't turned into the creature from the Black Lagoon. We also talk about makeup, nieces/nephews, our dogs, and a myriad of other topics. If we do talk about you, it's usually nice. Though, if you've been awful, it is a good time to vent and get it all out of our system so we can go back and get through the rest of the date. But that's only happened to me a couple of times.

Q. Why are 99.9% of you crazy? As in not right in the head?

A. Now, this one actually offended me a little. I'm not going to say that all women are wonderful, sensible beings who always have other people's interest at heart. That would be pretty stupid. However, all I can say is that if the only women you've come into contact with are crazy, it's time to find a new dating pool. Yeah, if the only gals you're attracted to look like vain, selfish girls, most likely they're going to be vain, selfish girls that assume all men are in love with them.

If truth be told, I think men have it easy when it comes to the dating world. Women are so much more forgiving when it comes to physical appearance and personality "flaws." A guy pal of mine recently told me that his roommate was interested in a cute gal, but upon finding out she was a picky eater, lost all interest in asking her even on one date. Even on this survey, a guy said, "To be honest, and not trying to be mean, guys are initially attracted to the physical appearance of the girl, and if a girl seldom gets asked out, it may be that she has a few things of her physical appearance she needs to work on."

'Nuff said.

Sick is the new Cool

So, I'm sick.

Again.

To those who I see daily, this should be shocking because it seems as though I've spent the majority of the last two months being ill.

Apparently, I just can't get enough. It would appear that I love being sick.

Top Ten Reasons Why Being Sick is Only For the Coolest of Individuals:

10. It gives my dad and I something to talk about:

Mish: Dad, I'm feeling sick.

Dad: Have you gone to the doctor? What if it's the swine flu? You know that kills people right? Promise me you'll go see a doctor this instant.

(ten minutes later)

Mish: Dad, it's ok. It just feels like a bad cold. A doctor wouldn't be able to do anything for me anyway.

Dad: Mish, listen to your father. You need to get it checked out. Do you need money? I'll send you some money if you need it to go to the doctor.

Mish: No, I'm fine. . . (conversation ends, twenty minutes later, with Mish promising to see the doctor the following day)

9. I always knew I was hot. Now I have a thermometer to prove it.

8. As one of my pals pointed out, coughing fits are excellent exercise for one's abs.

7. Being sick encourages my roommates to do nice things for me. In fact, just this evening, Kristina bought me a can of Lysol so I could disinfect the couch I've been inhabiting. (true statement)

6. I can catch up on all the miniserieses (how in the world would you spell that?) that I haven't had time to watch because I was trying to be social and stuff.

5. I have now become as scary and intimidating as my Rottweiler. In fact, if someone were to try to break in, and saw me, they'd run off thinking that I was going to chase after them and bite them.

4. I hear that the effects of a fever breaking can resemble a young, vibrant glow.

3. It takes talent to ooze out of various orifices. . . simultaneously.

2. My Star Trek dinner glass is mine. All mine. I don't have to fight for it, now that it's been "contaminated."

1. Fever-induced hallucinations are the new frontiers of imagination. Why just last night I had a fever dream that was insane. I dreamt that I was at school, but my principal had hired a substitute for me. The sub refused to leave and we were both trying to teach the class at the same time. Those subs.

Anyway, I sit here on my newly detoxified couch hoping that you and yours are feeling in good health.

It's My Birthday Present to Me!!!

So this year, I decided it was time to treat myself to an awesome adventure, so I headed to Disneyland with three of my good gal pals. It was quite an experience. The first day, the longest we had to wait in any line was 20 minutes. We rode on all the rides several times and walked until we hurt. It was a little rainy, so that helped to cut down on the crowds.
The next day was our day at California Adventure. It was perfect. Again, very small crowds and so much fun. We walked around soggy for most of the day due to the rapids ride.
Finally, the third day, Tony Winkel came to hang out with us and we re-did all our favorite rides. The temperatures got a bit crazy and by this point there were tons of people there, but we had already done everything again and again. The best experience was waiting in line for Splash Mountain (the wait was 75 minutes, but we were really hot, so it was worth it). In line behind us was a little boy with his parents. It was obvious the little boy didn't want to go on the ride. He watched the drop off again and again while we waited, and he was just crying up a storm. Wanting to be helpful, my roommate, Kristina, sought to comfort him. What follows is by no means a gross exaggeration of the event:

Child's Parents: Don't worry honey, this ride isn't scary at all. They're all screaming because they're having fun!

Child: No, I'm scared. This ride is scary!

Kristina: It's just the drop off at the very end that's scary, and it goes really fast right there, so it's extra not scary!

Child: (whimpers)

Kristina: And then there are all sorts of critters and symbiotic organisms to look at when you're not facing a sheer drop off. Doesn't that sound fun?

Child: (vomits)

Kristina: Don't you hear that happy music? Doesn't it make you feel safe and secure? It gets louder right before the shrieking eels bite you.

Child: (dies)


And that's how it went.

Yes I'm still Alive

I realize that it's been a while since I posted. I'm pretty sure the only person who is sad about that is my loving mother, who actually thinks I'm funny. So, I thought it would be appropriate to create a Top Ten list of things that have kept me from updating my blog:

Top Ten Reasons you Haven't Heard From me in a While (which may or may not be true):

10. I've been too busy dating. (and if you think that is true, I could also use some money.)

9. My new bedding is so comfortable, I can't bring myself to actually leave it (or wake up).

8. EPIC WARD ACTIVITIES 'nuff said.

7. I'm addicted to working on my personal history. I started it this summer, and am re-doing it
right now. Yep, that's right. Re-doing it.

6. I've been too busy making t-shirts in honor of my new favorite tv show: Glee!

5. I've been in a cocoon, progressing towards becoming beautiful butterfly.

4. Training a pack of wild dingoes takes dedication and stamina.

3. I've been watching so much Star Trek: The Next Generation that I actually thought I was Commander Riker.

2. School has left me a dry, husk of a woman.

1. I've been washing my hair. . . a lot.

School! We're Movin' on Up!

School starts tomorrow morning.
Officially.
I'm so excited.
Some people think that having an entire summer off is the ultimate in fun and excitedness. And it is. I've been able to do lots of fun stuff this summer (being in a play, visiting family out of state, picking up new interests, etc.), but there comes a time in every summer where I miss being in front of my class. I miss teaching Math. I miss talking about fun books with people who are reading them for the first time.
Plus, it will be extremely welcome to have work to take my mind off of other things. So, wish me luck!

The kids on the bus look so happy. Wouldn't you if your bus driver was able to drive using only one side of the bus?! Talk about cool!

On My Way Home

I'm actually sitting in the New York JFK airport at the moment, deciding which of the possibilities for time wasting sounds the most exciting. I have a brand new copy of "Flight of the Conchords" season two sitting next to me, and ipod in my bag, an awesome book that I'll probably read cover to cover before I get to Provo, and a Best Buy vending machine down the hallway that just looks so interesting (it appears as if I can buy ipods of all types and electronic accessories by inserting my card into a soda machine-looking like-thing). I chose blogging.
I have been lax in my blogging (about a month since the last tidbit of Michelle-ness-osity) and I apologize, kind of.
I've been traveling around a bit. Currently, I'm finishing up a trip to visit my brother, Mike, and his family in Boston (where they moved this past spring). Mom and I planned to show up on the same day, and we'd be followed by my sister, Tina, and her family. I assumed my adventure would be full of beans and cream pies.
Nope. Regardless of how grand my brother's house is, any place starts to feel small when 12 people are put inside it. My trip was filled with outings to various beaches, shopping in downtown Boston, and visiting the Plimouth Plantation (and no, I didn't spell that wrong). Being a history teacher, I loved the Plimouth Plantation (where actors dress up as the original colonists and they've recreated the original village of Plymouth.) I also got to go aboard the Mayflower II (a reproduction of the original). I saved several historical sites for my next visit (I'm looking forward to also seeing Lexington/Concord and Salem). So, if anybody's interested in joining up on the next Boston trip, let me know.